My shadow self
by ciaza
Summary: Silas drove away from the cliff in Stefan's car without much of a plan. In the trunk of the car he happened to find a certain set of journals dating back the last 100 years. What happens when he starts reading them and realizes that he and his doppelgänger might have something more than a face in common? Basically a Stilas fic.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello :) this is my first vampire diaries fic, so please be kind :D**

**I have no clue where this is going, it's just something I had to write after the season finale and the utterly amazing Stilas tag xD**

Silas was driving away from he cliff. He had just pushed his "shadow self" over. He smiled a bit. He was alive, moving and kicking. The world was his to take and nobody knew about it. They had no clue about what was to come. And when he made his move it would be too late. He continued smiling at the thought. A car drove past. He could smell the blood in the passengers. He closed his yes, released his fangs and pushed the brakes He was hungry.

He didn't know how long he had been driving. He didn't even know where he was going. He had spent 2000 years locked up and plotting revenge on everyone and destroying the other side. Now he really didn't have any idea what to do. He still wanted to do all that. But now he had no witch. He would have to find one.

He pulled over again. He looked at the car. The world had changed so much since he was last here. He opened the trunk, not knowing why.

There was a sports bag. It was his doppelgänger's car, he remembered. It must be his. Out of curiosity he started to go through the bag. It was full of clothes, books, cd's, personal hygiene stuff. His doppelgaäger had been leaving. Why?

He shook his head. Why should he care, this only meant no body would be looking for Stefan. It was a good thing.

He noticed another bag as well. Suitcase like and heavy one. He opened. It was full of books. He took one.

"Stefan's diaries 1955-1956" Said the tittle. He picked up another book, it was another journal. It looked like his doppelgänger had written down all his immortal life. Silas laughed a bit. That had been his plan. To be with his lover and write everything down, to cherish every moment of eternity they had together.

But that was history. This was now. He'd rip the world apart. He'd kill and manipulate every one he encountered until he got what he wanted. Silas smiled. It was going to be fun.

But the truth was he still didn't know a lot about this new age, 21st century. He looked at the journals.

Last 100 years of recorded history written down, right there in front of him . He picked up the first one.

"1864-1865." He muttered. "This'll do."

**OOooooOOo**

Stefan opened his eyes. Darkness, it was all he could see. He opened his mouth, water pushed in.

It hadn't been a dream. He was really locked up in a box in the bottom of the lake in middle of nowhere. He tried to force his way out, but he knew it wouldn't work. He needed to think, to make a strategy. But all he could think about was what had just happened. He was a doppelgänger! A stupid freaking doppelgänger tone of the most powerful beings in the universe. How was is even possible? He had to be related to Silas. But there weren't any warlocks in his family…

He had to stop thinking thing like that and get out. But what for?

Lexi was gone now, Elena and Damon had each other. No body would search for him. Nobody would even miss him.

He closed his eyes. Maybe it was better this way.

**This will be Silas/Stefan friendship and working together kind of thing, or maybe something more xD**

**Should I continue? :P reviews and suggestions are welcome ! **

**Plus feel free to correct me if I get something wrong since I haven't seen all the episodes of season 4.**


	2. Chapter 2

"I don't know what to do. I don't know who I am anymore. I feel like I lost myself when I tasted the blood of my father. Then again, that actually makes sense. I betrayed him. I betrayed everything I believed in. And I like it. I feel like I'm on the edge. Like there's no tomorrow. I'm about to jump to a void and drown myself in the darkness, never coming out. I want to rip Mystic Falls apart, I want to rip the whole world apart." One of the first journals said. Silas had been reading while driving. Silas stopped the car. He didn't like staying in a crappy car. He'd find something better and stop to plan.

**OoooOOO**

He couldn't stop reading. He was already at recent years . He had found a cheap road motel, dined on some of the guests and compelled the rest of them to sit still and keep quiet and he fed on them whenever he felt like it. And then he had stayed there reading. For seven days straight.

His intentions were to learn and study the new world. But it wasn't about it anymore.

He kept on reading unable to stop. The writing was beautiful, the metaphores and expressions were chilling and full of emotions. But it wasn't just that…it was the content.

Silas had been alone for 2000 years. He had decided a long time ago that that was how it was going to be. Alone and misunderstood.

Yet, he was slowly starting to feel t like his doppelgänger understood.

When Stefan wrote about his dreams, fears and difficulties Silas felt like he was reading about himself.

Silas had once been innocent once, a sick love puppy. A pacifist.

But it was a long time ago.

So had Stefan. But he had written down his transition to the darker side of vampirism. Even when he was busy killing, maiming and torturing he had always stopped to write down his thoughts. And those thoughts were intriguing indeed.

"I saw her today." A chapter started. " Katherine Pierce. She is not dead. She is the reason I'm still here. She damned me. A bliss of perfection I thought her once to be. She dragged me into this world, saying she loved me. I thought I loved her too, but I never did. I love Elena. Like I've never loved anyone. I want to be with her, even though I know in the end someone will get hurt, probably we both. I feel like burning something down.

Back when I was on my bad period I used to burn down entire villages, when I wasn't hungry and I just felt like it. I liked the flames, still do. Fire is there only when you feed it, it almost seems like a living thing. But it's not. It's just destroys everything in its way and then it fades. It's like me."

Silas laid down the book and gritted his teeth. He had loved the ideas he had read. They felt like his own, but yet he hadn't come up with them.

He shouldn't have locked Stefan up. He cursed out loud.

How could he think like that? Stefan was his doppelgänger! A weakness to him! He had had to lock Stefan up to protect him self. He needed Stefan to be alive. And to lock him up was to only way to make sure of it..

Of course there was another way…to keep an eye on Stefan himself..he had a lot of potential, great thoughts, amazing ideas…

Silas shook his head. He'd find a cult or something to do his dirty work. He'd compel people, he didn't need anyone.

But after the idea had entered his head, he found himself walking towards the car.

"I'll be back with a friend. He'll be hungry. Stay right there." He said to the 7 people in the motel that were still alive.

**Hope you like it :P reviews and suggestions are welcome !**


	3. Chapter 3

" Under the sea. Under the sea, darling it's better, down where it's wetter take it from me." Stefan was singing. He didn't know why. He coughed and giggled a little.

Was he going mad? This fast? Lexi had once in his " rehab" made him hallucinate the feeling after being moths with out of blood, he hadn't lost his sanity fast. Why was he loosing it this fast now? Oh, right. he was in the bottom of a f*cking lake In a box. Starving under a few hundred meters of water was horrible. Oh yes he was going mad.

He wasn't going to die in there. He was going to suffer. Probably for a long time. "Do you have any idea what it's like to starve for 2000 years?" Silas had said.

Stefan gritted his teeth. He couldn't bear it. He wanted to get out and rip someone's throat out. Feed of everyone he encountered…

He bit his lip. He needed to stop thinking. Maybe he could sleep? It wouldn't be so bad if he was in slumber, would it?

He closed his eyes.

Then he heard something from the outside. Something was swimming rapidly towards the box. Could it be…? No, he couldn't get his hopes up. Nobody would notice he was gone, it was probably just a big fish.

Then he heard a thud, something was touching the box. As he opened his eyes he felt a sudden rush of water on his face. He wasn't in a box anymore. Someone had just ripped his way through it.

The pressure of the water was overwhelming and Stefan was already sick with hunger. He started to sink and drift into unconsciousness. Then he saw someone.

His own face. Smirking in front of him. He felt some one taking him by the waist. It had to be an hallucination. He was truly going mad….

**OooooOOO**

Stefan woke up to a sound of motor. Slowly he opened his eyes. He was weak and could barely move. He was sitting on the front seat of his own car. Some one else was driving.

He saw his own face turning to him and smirking. "Don't get any funny ideas. If you try anything I'll put you back in that box." He said.

Stefan shook his head. Silas. Silas had just dug him out of the bottom of the lake where Silas himself had put him…

Stefan coughed. He didn't know what to say or do. So he kept quiet and just stared at his doppelgänger.

Stefan didn't fight back as Silas carried him out of the car. They were in the middle of nowhere at some road side motel. Stefan coughed and twisted his face in pain as Silas dropped him on the floor of the entrance room.

"Now here we go." Silas said smiling at him. "GIRLS!" He shouted then. Seven girls dressed in beautiful nightgowns came from the room next door. Their bodies were filled with bite marks.

"They were the prettiest so I thought I'd save them for last." Silas said.

Stefan coughed. "Wha-what is this? What are you doing?" He was still lying on the floor.

"Brought you lunch. I thought you'd be hungry." Silas answered.

As the girls came closer and kneeled beside him, Stefan could feel his self control slipping. The last words he managed to say before going full Rippah-mode were:

"Bu-but why?"

Silas watched interestingly as his doppelgänger fed, killed and finally ripped the heads of the victims.

One does not usually see "himself " killing and Silas thought it was beautiful. Just like he would have done it.


	4. Chapter 4

**HUGE thank you for the positive feedback :) I'm bad at updating or finishing my stories, so I always kind of need a push :P**

Stefan inhaled. He could feel the blood running through his veins. He wanted more. He was blood drunk once again. He raised his gaze from the floor. He was still sitting on it, surrounded by the bodies. Silas was slouching on a chair looking at him with interest. He smiled a bit.

Stefan laughed.

"So this is your master plan? To corrupt me? Get me to do your dirty work. "Oh, lets make Stefan drink blood so he'll start ripping people's heads of and be my right hand." Not a very original idea you know?" He said with a smirk.

Silas' face remained serious.

"I don't need you for anything." He said simply.

Even though the man was a master of manipulation Stefan thought he was hearing the truth.

"Then why did you dig me up?"

It was Silas' turn to smile.

"Maybe I just want you here." he said simply.

Stefan didn't know what to do. He stood up. He could try to run away. He needed to get to his friends warn them about Silas, tell them about Bonnie…

Suddenly Silas was on him, pushing him against the wall.

"Don't try anything stupid, I already told you, didn't I?" He said with a smirk.

Stefan filched a little to the man's sudden closeness.

"Wha- what do you want from me?" He said.

"Simple." Silas said and looked at Stefan with compelling eyes.

"I want you to stay here. You are not get out." He stopped the compelling.

"I will be here, as well as visiting near by cities and Mystic Falls. I think I could easily pass as one of the residents." He said still smirking.

Stefan was utterly confused. This man had been making their lives a living hell for the last months or so. And now he seems calm, reasonable even.

"What do you wish to achieve? Tear down the other side" Stefan asked finally.

"A good polite question! " Silas laughed. "Even though you must be under such a pressure and going through a lot of emotions you still manage to do polite. I like you." he said. Stefan could feel warmth and appreciation in the man's voice, no, he must have imagined it.

Stefan's face showed nothing but confusion. Silas decided to add:

"I have plans. My plans require a witch or witches, since I'm no longer capable to do magic. " He looked sad when saying that. "But yes. That is my ultimate goal. Destroy it or get to there."

Silas walked towards the entrance. "I will leave you here for now. Don't worry. I'll be bringing food." He said winked and disappeared.

Stefan walked around the hotel. There were blood spatters everywhere, but no bodies. Silas was a clean monster. Stefan stopped by a window. It would be so easy to just jump and run away…except for the fact that he was compelled not to. He sighed. He was stuck in the middle of nowhere in a motel.

It did beat the box though….

**So this is a shortie, but I hope you like it anyway ! ^_^**


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello again :) **

Silas walked through the streets of mystic falls. He had decided to start looking for witches or clues about them in there since the town seemed to be filed with supernaturals.

"Stefan." A pretty blond said stopping him. "Caroline." Silas answered.

"I thought you left town. Elena said that you would want to after…" She bit her lip. "She's a stupid silly teenager you know? She doesn't know how to make the right choices yet.." She continued babbling

Silas had caught on and had a pretty good idea what was going on.

"I plan to. I just need to grab some more stuff from the house. " He said and mimicked a "Stefan sad face".

Caroline smiled sympathetically. "You know we did find something. I mean Jeremy did. I mean Jeremy said that Bonnie did. But she's not here. She went to spent the summer with some relatives or something. He's asked to meet us all. Want to come too? I mean we did thought you left, but it's always good to see you." She said smiling.

Silas forced on a smile. They could have some information he could use…

They went to the Salvatore house. There in the living room Jeremy, Damon and Elena were waiting for them. Silas tried to act as awkwardly as he could around the last two.

"We need to test that all the attendants here are really who they claim to be." Jeremy said. Silas looked around. So, it was obviously clear to everyone that Jeremy was alive, but yet none nobody seemed to know Bonnie was dead, since they weren't sad..except for Jeremy of course. Silas smiled a bit looking at him.

"Why? Isn't Silas "stoned " somewhere?" Caroline said smiling at her own punchline. So Jeremy must have an idea that now that Bonnie's gone I might be back, Silas thought.

"We can't be sure. The test. Everyone has to ask someone a question and answer someone's question." Jeremy said.

Silas felt a bit nervous. Well, if it had to come down to that he'd just kill,compel and manipulate everyone in the room. Still he didn't want to do that, they could be useful…

Questions were asked, answers given. Then it was Silas' turn to ask.

"What were your first words to me?" He asked Elena.

She blushed biting her lip and looking down.

"You caught me coming from the men's room. I stuttered and finally managed to say "it's a long story"

Silas looked down as well. "Correct." He said.

Damon was quiet for a while. "Well, then brother. What were you up to in 1863 ?"

"I had just got engaged and argued with father about it, a lot. You and I went out to the town to celebrate almost every night" Silas answered.

Damon nodded.

Silas smirked. That had been easy. He could easily pass as Stefan after reading his diaries….

"Good." Jeremy said. "Everyone add a drop of your blood." He said holding a golden orb kind of artifact.

"What is that?" Silas asked instantly.

"Bonnie told me it's ancient witchcraft. It is for blocking hallucinations. Who ever puts his blood in here is protected against it." Jeremy explained.

But Silas didn't need to hear it, he knew exactly what it was. _He _himself had created it 2000 years earlier. But why was it here? He could no longer rely on his ability to swap faces. He'd be Stefan. Then again he had no problem with that..

He looked at the orb again. How the heck did it get in here? It was supposed to be hidden somewhere in the Other side. He himself had made sure of it, that it would be gone forever. That there would be nothing to stop him.

Bonnie.

It had to be Bonnie's doing. The witch was dead, so she could get there.

Maybe she wasn't that out of the picture as Silas had thought….

**OOOooooooOOO**

Stefan was asleep but opened his eyes in a brink of a second as he felt other vampire's presence in the motel. He glided down the stairs and was greeted by smiling Silas.

"Hello my shadow self." He said again smirking.

Stefan laughed sarcastically. "Don't you think that's a bit too dramatic?" he said.

Silas didn't answer and started walking up the stairs.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Stefan asked him.

"Sleep. I still need to you know." Silas answered simply and continued walking.

Stefan had had it with the man.

"WHY AM I HERE?" He shouted after him.

Silas turned around. "I already told you. I wanted you here."

"That doesn't explain a shit!" Stefan shouted.

Silas bit his lip and looked thoughtful for a while. The look didn't suit him.

"Because I need you protected." He said simply. Suddenly Stefan had the same thoughtful look on his face.

"People could hurt you through me." He said. It wasn't a question, it was a conclusion. Silas just nodded and finally climbed up the stairs.

**Reviews are appreciated :) I would also love to hear suggestions ! ^_^ **


	6. Chapter 6

The next day Silas went out for all day. He returned at nightfall bringing couple of humans with him. Since his last feeding from the "nightgown girls" Stefan had decided not to feed. He didn't want himself to go down the road like he had with Klaus. Then again Silas could always just compel him if he didn't.

Stefan had managed to say "No thanks." As Silas offered him a human and slipped up stairs. Silas had been annoyed, Stefan could tell. But still the man hadn't done anything.

Stefan woke up. He was alone in the hotel again. Silas had gone out again, he'd probably be gone for the whole day, Stefan assumed.

He decided to snoop around. He quickly found the room Silas slept in. It was filled with _personal _artifacts, books and other things. Stefan was surprised. Silas read? Brushed his teeth? Among other thins so humane…

On the desk of the room he noticed a black leather book, next to it was a quill. Stefan lifted the book and read the page that was open.

" _I decided I should pick this up again. Writing everything down. I suppose it will be hard, I haven't done it for ages, but I have an eternity after all so I should do this. And I'm so close. I have the spell, the ingredients, the perfect place to perform it. All I need is a goddam witch. A decent one. This makes me almost sad that that Bonnie girl is dead. I liked her. She was powerful." _

There wasn't anymore text on that page. Stefan turned the book over. It was old. Really old. In the cover stood.

"Journals of Silas"

Silas had kept a journal?

Eagerly Stefan turned the first page.

"_Love is pure and divine. It fills my heart like no spell has done before. Just the name Dunixi The mention of it fills my heart with lust and love. Dunixi is mine. I'm Dunixi's. As wrong as it might be, I want it to be forever._

_We shall never fade."_

Stefan read the words through again. So Dunixi must be the name of the woman Silas had loved so very much. What a weird name. Stefan thought. But then again Silas and Qetsiyah were both weird names.

Stefan heard the motel door open. He could also hear clear footsteps, _human _footsteps.

In seconds he was down stairs.

Silas was back, smiling at him and holding four women. The two of them that he hadn't on his grip were clearly compelled, but the other two who he was holding tightly by their necks were terrified and holding tears.

"I brought dinner." Silas said.

"No." Stefan spat out through his lips.

Silas laughed a bit. "Alright." He said turning his back to Stefan.

_What? _Wasn't he going to make him do it. Why ask for his opinion, why care about it at all when he could just…

"So, you actually listen to me?" Stefan said.

Silas pulled in his fangs and turned back to Stefan.

"Why wouldn't I?" He said. "I want your heart to be in this." He said simply.

Stefan swallowed and said confidently:"It never will be."

To his surprise he received a smirk from his older doppelgänger.

"Oh, it already is." He said and sunk his fangs in one of the girls' neck. That one hadn't been compelled and she screamed loudly. In seconds her head was on the floor.

Everything slowed down for Stefan. So that was what it looked like when he lost control. It looked... exhilarating.

Silas already had one of the compelled girls in his arms, but to Stefan's surprise Silas jerked the other uncompelled girl to him. She fell right into Stefan's arms

"Please, mister help me."

Blood rushed into Stefan's eyes turning them black, his fangs pushed out. He could smell the blood in the air, he had seen Silas kill a girl just like he did when in Ripper mode.

As the girl in his arms screamed the ensemble turned into perfection. Stefan smiled as he bit the girl.

**OooooooooO**

Stefan felt dizzy. He was loosing control again. Fading into darkness. He knew this would happen again eventually, but this soon. It was all Silas' fault. How did the man have such an impact on him?

Stefan was sitting on a couch in the motel lobby. He hat sat there the whole night. Suddenly Silas was there beside him.

"We are moving out." He said simply.

"Where?" Stefan asked. He had stopped asking about Silas' plans since the man obviously wasn't telling him more.

"Mystic Falls." Silas said.

Stefan was surprised. Silas wanted to find witches and pretty much destroy the world according the tales. Why stick around a stupid little town like that? Stefan didn't need to ask as his doppelgänger explained:

"I need an army of mystical beings. There are a lot of those there."

Stefan laughed. "They will never help you."

Silas smirked. "Do you think I will give them a choice?"

"You are giving me choices!" Stefan said. "Free choices. Why?"

Silas turned to look at him straight into his eyes. "Because you are my doppelgänger. You are important."

Stefan stood up laughing. "It's not that rare you know? Elena and Katherine are doppelgängers too. They try to kill each other all the time and don't think that the other one is that important."

Silas stood up and placed a hand on Stefan's shoulder. "That's because they are both someone else's doppelgängers. The original one is dead. Elena is _a doppelgänger. _So is Katherine. But you, my friend. You are _the doppelgänger. _You are mine. A copy of _me." _Silas explained very mentor-like.

He smiled at Stefan before leaving him alone to his thoughts.

**Well, I hope you're still liking it :)**

**I must warn there will be an update pause for about a month pretty soon :S I'm going to travel a bit and will be unable to write**

**Reply to Stefan's Girl : **

**I absolutely love your feedback :) thank you so much ! Plus the suggestion was amazing :D I'm definitely going to do something like that in the near future :) ! **


	7. Chapter 7

**I'm VERY unsure about this chapter :/ It has a MAJOR story/plot changer that I'm not sure about..so please give me feedback about it!**

Silas was loading a car. Stefan watched him do it inside the hotel, since he still couldn't step out. _Silas loading a car_. An ancient creature lifting sports bags and checking on gasoline. It was hilarious.

Finally he came back into the hotel for another bag, he lifted it and stopped right in front of Stefan. They hadn't really talked since Silas informed where they were leaving. It had been 3 days. Silas had been away most of the time. He had even visited Mystic Falls and informed everyone that he (as Stefan) was coming back. Nobody had suspected a thing.

"You can come out of there you know, to help me."

"I can't. You compelled me." Stefan answered.

Silas laughed. "I did not. You were free the whole time. I told you, I want you to have free choices."

Stefan tried to put his feet out. He could. The man was telling the truth. He had been free. He was never under any kind of compulsion. How stupid of him not to realize.

He could escape..he could run to his friends and tell them about Silas and his plans…

He ran.

As fast as he could, but it was stupid he knew..Silas would catch him eventually. Except for the fact that he wasn't chasing him.

He had left Stefan go. Just like that.

What the hell was the man's plan? Stefan tilted his head in frustration and ran back to him.

Silas was leaning against the car. "Well shall we?" he said as Stefan arrived and pointed at the car door.

Stefan just looked at him. Silas was the most mysterious and odd being Stefan had ever encountered. He treated Stefan like a friend or protegee. But he was about to destroy the world. Stefan remembered the lines he had read. Maybe he colt reason with Silas? Make him see that what he was about to do was wrong? He laughed at the idea, but still the words came out of his mouth.

"You don't do this kind of things for love." Stefan said simply.

Silas looked at him questioning.

"You don't manipulate or destroy for love. _Love is pure and divine. It should fill your heart like no spell has before."_ Stefan said quotating Silas' diary.

The man lifted an eyebrow and looked down biting his lip. That look once again didn't suit the man. He looked _sad, _weak even.

"You have been busy." he said still not lifting his gaze.

Stefan kept looking at Silas, waiting for better reaction.

"But maybe I just feel_ like there's no tomorrow_, like _I'm about to jump to a void and drown myself in the darkness, never coming out_." Silas lifted his gaze looking at Stefan.

Stefan recognized the quote. His journal from 1864. One of the darkest periods of his life.

"Besides, don't you just_ want to rip Mystic Falls apart, want to rip the whole world apart." _Silas continued.

Stefan was shocked. He never wanted anyone to read that…Or any of the dark thoughts he had written down when he was in his Ripper periods.

Silas smirked.

"An interesting read, your diaries." Silas said.

Stefan bit his lip.

"Which ones did you read?"

"All of them."

Stefan lifted an eyebrow.

"You are an amazingly talented writer, Stefan. I found your thoughts…compelling." Silas continued.

"eeerm….thank you." Stefan said awkwardly. He didn't know what to say..

They stood there in silence for a while.

"Then you must know every terrible thing I have ever done." Stefan said finally.

"I did them for my own amusement. Even that is better than claiming to do them for love."

Silas' eyes flinched in anger and within seconds he had Stefan by throat and pinned against the car's roof.

"Don't you see? Love is all I care about. 2000 years in a tomb. I lost everything, sometimes I doubt that even my sanity, but not love. I will love Dunixi till the end of time and I'll do anything to get him back."

"_Him?" _Stefan said in shock.

**OoooooO**

Silas released Stefan from his grip. He laughed a bit and touch his lips with his hand, a small gesture both of them seemed to do when amused and wanting to explain something.

"Do you honestly think a story can go around for 2000 years without changing?" Silas asked.

"Dunixi was a man. You…you are gay?" Stefan stuttered, still leaning on the car.

"Yes, and I have dug into modern popular culture it seems to be common amongst witches, Dumbledore, Willow, maybe Gandalf even." The man said with a smirk.

Stefan still looked at the man in disbelief.

"Did you honestly think Quetsiah did all that just because I chose another woman? She wasn't that crazy. It was the fact that I could never find her attractive nor love her like that that drove her mad. She was one of the most beautiful women on earth, everyone was drawn to her charms. Everyone except me. And well gay population is still discriminated, right? It was about 2000 times worse back then."

"Why…why are you telling me all this?" Stefan asked confused.

"Because I want you to get your facts right. Now get in the car."

**PLEASE opinions, I don't like changing something so big from the show ( Silas' lover's gender) but it just kind of happened.. I might re-edit this chapter to change it back, idk. OPINIONS PLEASE :S**

** But if you have noticed I've never referred to Silas' lover as "her" in the story ;D**

**I have no idea if this will become slash -.- I've never written one and I imagine feeling very uncomfortable with it, but I admit if this continues down the road it has taken...well anything is possible :D **

**So please tell me in the reviews what it is that you want to see ! ^_^ **


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello ! And a huge apology that this update took me a while. I did mention that I was traveling and wouldn't update for a while, right? But also I'm my own worst critic and I had MAJOR problems with this chapter..I'm still not happy about the way it turned out so I might edit it**

**Also I received a lot of positive feedback from the last chapter, so I'm not changing a thing there :) THANK YOU 3**

**now to the actual story :P **

Silas was driving as Stefan sat on the front seat in pure confusion. Silas was gay. Dunixi was a man. And he himself was free to go but still stuck around. He could have escaped. Why didn't he?

He looked at Silas under his eyebrows. Was the man manipulating him somehow?

Silas turned to look at Stefan as well.

"I've decided that we shall take the Blackwood residence which is about 10 miles from the center area of the town, but you of course already knew that." Silas said.

"I'm not forming some kind of Stockholm syndrome you know." Stefan said, without knowing if he was just trying to assure himself that by saying it out loud.

Silas smirked. "Of course not. You'd be too smart for that."

They arrived to the Blackwood residence. It was completely made out of wood that was painted black, how obvious. The manor was quite big and it had couple of separate buildings and a garage, where they parked the car.

"So, where have the Blackwoods gone?" Stefan asked.

"I convinced them to take a vacation." Silas said. Stefan snorted a bit. The man was more than ok with compelling and manipulating everyone else except him, Stefan easily forgot that.

"So what is your master plan?" Stefan said as he carried his bags inside.

"To compel every supernatural creature in Mystic Falls and set them on a quest around the world to find me witches. " Silas said.

"Doesn't sound like a master plan to me." Stefan said critically.

"You got a better idea?" Silas asked.

"Well…Bonnie."

"She's dead."

"Jeremy can see the dead." Stefan said.

Silas shook his head. Of course he could, how silly of him not to realize. And he was the one who had brought the orb. Of course Jeremy had to be capable of communicating with Bonnie.

A grin appeared on Silas' face and Stefan instantly hoped he had just shut up. What the hell was he doing? Was he helping the mad man?

"Thank you." Silas said still grinning.

"I'm going to form a new plan."

**OoooooO**

Stefan was laying on a comfortable double bed in the Blackwood manor. He hadn't slept that well. Opening his eyes he decided that today he'd finally go and warn everyone, no matter how much Damon and Elena wouldn't want him there. He needed to protect them. Silas was mad…and the fact that he actually _liked _being around him was worrying. Though, he wouldn't admit that even to himself..

Suddenly the bedroom door opened and Silas stormed in holding a book and sat down on Stefan's bed. He was already fully dressed, in Stefan's clothes. So he must be going to Mystic Falls today, Stefan thought.

"I have a plan and I need you." Silas said simply.

Stefan blinked a couple of times and tried to fully wake up.

"You know people knock when coming in some one's room." He said simply and rose to sit. He was wearing only boxers.

"What if I had been naked?"

"Well that wouldn't have been a problem since I already know every inch of that body. " Silas said grinning.

Stefan shifted uncomfortably.

"I need you to get this for me." Silas said showing a picture of a golden orb kind of thing in the book.

Stefan laughed a bit. "Why would I do that? Didn't you say you didn't need me for anything?"

"You already helped me with this plan, so why wouldn't you participate?"

"Because I don't want to destroy the world." Stefan said with his sassy "isn't it obvious" tone.

"She was called Lexi, right? Your friend." Silas started.

Stefan nodded.

"Wouldn't you destroy it for her? For that she could be free and you could see her again? Even for a minute?"

Stefan looked at Silas questioning.

"Qetsiyah created the other side so that I would have to be with her forever. How ever there is a place like that for humans. That is where Dunixi is. Since the cure is gone, Yeh, I found that out while in Mystic falls, there is only one choice. I can not die, so I will bring him back. To do that I must tear down all the barriers, the one for the Other side and the one for the human equivalent. It will, unfortunately probably cause the whole world to collapse. But at least I'd get a second with him. And you'd be reunited with Lexi."

"There are people here in this world that I care about as well. And people I don't know. Good people who deserve the life they have" Stefan said simply.

"Like you don't?" Silas asked. His tone was serious and he looked at Stefan with piercing eyes.

Stefan was silent for a while.

"I'm a monster. Have been for a long time and will always be." Stefan said almost with a whisper, like admitting it out loud for the first time.

Silas quickly changed the subject.

"But you said that you care about people. Who?"

"Damon, Caroline…Elena." Stefan answered.

Silas laughed a bit.

"Your brother screw your girlfriend and she left you for him. And Caroline? Well, she's just your rebound Lexi, isn't she?" Silas said.

"But the real one, your Lexi is on the Other side. It's a purgatory. She is suffering there. Don't you want to free her and all the others? Don't you want to see what comes next? When we rid this evil world of it's boundaries. Who knows maybe there'll be something better" Silas said. He looked like he was dreaming. The man had certainly put a lot of thought into that philosophy.

"She wouldn't want me to do this." Stefan said trying to fake calm. The truth was that Silas was getting to him…once again. The world was full of evil. And lately after going to a killing spree with Klaus he had started to think that maybe anything was better than this chaos they lived in.

Silas licked his lips turning completely to Stefan.

"I lost him. My true love. I spent 2000 years in hell and all I want is one moment with him. Ask me anything in return and I will do it. You have my word."

Stefan knew he was under Silas' spell again. He'd do it. Because of he could imagine how the man felt. No…he could almost feel it.

"What do you need this for? Why do I have to get it?" Stefan asked showing a sign that he'd do it.

Silas smiled a bit. It was a kind smile.

"It's an artifact that has been on the Other side. It is important in the spell I'm planning on doing. While you're getting it I will be questioning Jeremy. Once we do this everyone will figure out more or less what's going on. That's why I need you. I want to act as fast as possible. "

Stefan nodded and walked for the door.

"Hey." Silas whispered after him.

"Don't think, even for a second that you don't deserve to live. That's an order as well."

**OoooooooO**

Stefan was walking towards the Salvatore house. Silas said that the orb would be under Damon's guardiance. He had thought what he was about to do for a while. But then let it go. He wanted to do this. He would free Lexi and others like her from their suffering, he would end the evil for good. Even though it might end everything for good...

But still it was the right thing to do. It had to be. After all Stefan had nothing left to lose in this world.

He knocked the door. A sleepy damon wearing just his pajama pants opened. He smirked. "Hi, little brother. You did say you were coming back, so what brings you back to town again?" So they were supposed to be over the fact that Elena had chosen him. Stefan faked a smile. "Just came to see my big brother." he said as he stepped in.

Damon sat down on one of the chairs. "No, what really brings you back."

"You got the golden orb? Where is it?" Stefan said simply.

"Yeh, I got it. It's in the the draw of my bedside table."

"Good, thanks." Stefan said and started walking towards his brother's bedroom.

"What do you need it for? Jeremy said he needed it protected. You're acting weird, brother." Damon said following him.

"Jeremy said he needs it back." Stefan lied, opened the bedroom door and caused sleepy Elena to wake up.

"Ste-Stefan?" She said opening her eyes. She was naked under the covers.

Stefan ignored her and the pain that seeing Damon and Elena together caused him. He simply walked to the draw took out the orb and left.

"What was that?" Elena asked.

"Something weird is up with my baby brother." Damon said. His phone rang. It was Caroline.

"I think Stefan is compelled by someone." She said panicking.

"What do you mean?"

"Because I just saw him running super fast out of town dragging Jeremy violently behind him. He was too fast, I couldn't keep up, I have no idea where they went." She said.

"Wait, exactly how long ago did you see him?" Damon asked. Elena looked at him puzzled.

"Just now, why?"

"Because Stefan was right here."


	9. Chapter 9

Silas kept dragging Jeremy through forests and empty streets. Even though he was still a hunter and a strong one Jeremy was no match for the oldest vampire in the world.

"Stefan stop it!" He tried to scream. Suddenly they stopped. Jeremy was pushed to the ground and the man that had been dragging him stood tall in front of him looking at him coldly. When he had grabbed Jeremy from the back of his collar Jeremy had recognized Stefan's face. He was surprised that Stefan would threat him so, but then again ever since Elena had chosen Damon everyone had expected Stefan to loose it.

But the man looking at him didn't have a crazy, hurt look in his eyes. He seemed determinant and slightly amused. It couldn't be Stefan. The man smirked as Jeremy's eyes widened.

"Si-silas?" He stuttered. Silas' smirk just widened.

Jeremy was utterly confused. Bonnie had mentioned that there was a chance that Silas would be back now that she was dead. But she said that it was unlikely. And then there was the fact that Silas seemed to be wearing Stefan's face. How long had he been doing that? Wasn't he supposed to be seen in his real form now?

Silas laughed. "It is fun to watch your little brain trying to reach conclusions you must be so utterly confused silly child. But I need to ask you a serious question and I'd like a serious answer, so think fast."

"Is-is this your real face?" Jeremy stuttered.

Silas let out an angry sigh. Why did people had to question so obvious things; Jeremy had all the pieces to the puzzle, he could complete it himself. Still humans never trusted their deduction skills, they always had to confirm the most obvious things. Everyone did it 2000 years ago and seemed to do it still. Everyone but Stefan. Silas smiled a little. He had only spent few weeks in his company, but he had learn to care for his doppelgänger and he was important for his plans to function. Stefan was his wingman. And he hated leaving him alone, and now that Stefan was out of his reach in Mystic Falls he hated it even more. Silas kept worrying that he might not return.

Jeremy continued looking at Silas questioning. Silas snapped out of his thoughts.

"Yes it is." He answered annoyedly. He wanted to gut the Gilbert boy for his stupidity, but luckily he sensed a familiar presence in the Blackwood manor grounds.

Stefan walked out of the forest. From a far Silas' eyes could see that he was smiling proudly and holding the golden orb. But Jeremy couldn't. When he finally recognized the new comer to be Stefan he started to shout.

"Go! RUN! Tell the others he's back!"

Silas let out a groan. How stupid was the boy? He knocked him unconscious and went to greet his doppelgänger.

**OoooooooO**

Caroline had went down to the Salvatore boarding house straight after the phone call. There she found Elena sitting in sofa in the lounge and Damon pacing around nervously.

"So whats going on?" She asked closing the front door.

"It seems we have multiple Stefans running around town doing shady stuff. They have the golden orb and Jeremy."

"what are we going to do? Is it another face changer?" Caroline asked.

Elena stood up biting her lip. " I revised a grimoar Bonnie left behind. The orb is supposed to protect from all mind games like that. So no, we are dealing with two Stefan faced people."

" You don't think neither one of them was the real Stefan?" Caroline asked.

"Of course not. Stefan isn't capable of something like this. He'd never hurt Jeremy"

Both Damon and Caroline looked at her doubting. Nobody know what a heartbroken Stefan was capable of.

Silas had dragged the unconscious Jeremy into the basement. He had said to Stefan that the plan was working well, but it required that Jeremy suffered some physical pain. Silas had kindly said that Stefan might want to get out of the house for that part. Stefan agreed.

He was walking outside in a misty forest. He tried to think, but he couldn't. Ever since joining forces with his doppelgänger his thought process had become difficult. Like it was tainted somehow.

Stefan closed his eyes smelling the air. Even though he felt tainted…He felt more alive than ever. He felt sure and secure and most importantly right. There was no internal conflict. Everything seemed so clear. Nothing had ever been clear for him before.

Suddenly he heard a whoosh sound close by.

"STEFAN?" Some one shouted.

Stefan recognized that voice. Of course his brother would figure out that something was going on, but Stefan hadn't expect Damon to run out and search for him in random places. Quietly Stefan retreated trying to stay hidden from his brother.

He ran straight back to the manor hoping that Damon hadn't notice him. He didn't want Damon to see him. He was obviously concerned and felt like Stefan would need him. Need him to pull Stefan out of his mess again. But this wasn't the case.

Plus Silas would kill Damon in a heart beat given the chance. Stefan needed to stay away from Damon to protect him, but also to protect Silas and their plan. It was all too complicated.

He opened the door. Jeremy's screams echoed through the manor. Now it was obvious why Silas recommended Stefan to go away. Jeremy was after all his friend.

**Not much meat in this chapter :P But I promise there is some interesting stuff coming !**

**Reply to Stefan's girl: I'm not ruling out the Stilas romance... ;) but I think their relationship will need to develop a bit more...But (SPOILERS KIND OF... ) there's a "turning point" coming for them pretty soon :P Thank you so much for the support and ideas ! :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello :) Unlike the last chapter I feel like this one almost has too much stuff :P**

Stefan ran to the basement door but Silas was already out and coming up the stairs to the first floor, he must have heard Stefan coming.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO HIM?" Stefan shouted. Silas walked calmly to Stefan.

"Nothing bad. Just some mental testing and flexing around his mind. I promise you he wont be physically hurt." He said.

Stefan gritted his teeth. "I've heard what you can do mentally. It's even worse isn't it?"

"Well thank you for the compliment."

Stefan snorted. "He is a good guy. One of the best I know. He doesn't deserve this. Do you hear me? I'm stopping this."

But their conversation was stopped as both of them heard whispers from the basement.

"Great, you already got him crazy, now he is talking to himself." Stefan said and was about to go down.

Silas put a hand on Stefan's shoulder.

"No, I believe he is talking to someone. Someone we might not be able to see." He smiled a bit. It was a crooked smile.

"I'm happy to inform you I won't be hurting him anymore. Our plan is working just fine."

Stefan nodded gritting his teeth. But when had it became _our _plan? He didn't know and right now he didn't care.

"I'm going in there. Jeremy is my friend."

To Stefan's surprise Silas didn't try to stop him. That made Stefan curious…

As he passed the man he stopped for a while to look at Silas. Silas seemed…off somehow.

"Maybe I was too hard on him."

Silas said it. Actually said it out loud with a tone full of hesitation and..._compassion? _

Stefan's mouth opened a bit in surprise. What was going on?

Suddenly Silas looked right at him.

"I believe I can feel your empathy. It is affecting me."

As he heard Silas saying it he finally accepted it himself. He could feel the man's feelings. In fact he had been feeling them for a while now, they were so mixed with his own that he didn't even recognize them anymore.

"I can feel yours too." Stefan said. "I mean the clarity you have and the hatred."

Silas smiled a bit.

"What's causing it?" Stefan asked.

"I already told you you are literally a copy of me. The universe wants us to be exactly the same, I didn't think it'd include feelings, opinions and emotions, but it seems it does."

"Does it mean that in time I will become exactly like you in every way?"

"I think not." Silas muttered. "As I said I can feel your empathy. It is strong. You are strong. I have no idea what will happen, Stefan."

**OoooooO**

Stefan went down the stairs and opened the basement door. Jeremy was sitting on the hard concrete floor, his wrists and ankles in chains. He had stopped mumbling as he had heard someone coming.

"Bu…But you said you were done..for today." He said, he was breathing heavily. Stefan felt uncomfortable. This was his fault. But at the same time he felt strong sense of purpose. This needed to be done. It was doing his head in…

He shook it a bit.

"No, Jer. It's me." He said and smiled a bit.

"Ste..Stefan?" Jeremy's voice was weak and disbelieving.

Stefan kneeled beside him.

"Yeh, it's me. I'm so sorry for all this. Did he go hard on you?"

Jeremy blinked and tried to stand up a bit, he failed and fell on the floor. His mind was still damaged and it was making moving and speaking difficult.

"You knew I was here. The entire time. You are working with him?" Jeremy tried to say as threateningly as he could.

"Yes, but it's not what you think…." Stefan started.

"So you're a Ripper again. Despite everything my sister did for you and your own brother as well. After all good you came you're brainwashed and ax crazy again." Jeremy said.

Stefan curled his fists. Elena and Damon were the last people he wanted to have a conversation about, but he ignored the mention of them, He needed to make Jeremy see that this was different. That he wasn't the bad guy.

"You're wrong. Even you know it. If I was back of the wagon you'd be dead by now. I wouldn't care about anything. I'd leave you here alone, to rot or I'd just rip your head off. But I'm here, talking to you. Trying to make you feel more comfortable." Stefan said.

Jeremy looked at Stefan angrily, then the basement door opened.

"I grew bored" Silas said as he entered. "So I decided we might as well finis this today…"

Stefan stood up and nodded at his doppelgänger. Silas smiled a bit. Jeremy observed the two men interacting. It was weird. When in the same room they seemed equal in every way. And the smiles they shared. They were friendly. Not hateful or demanding.

"I need you to hold him still for a while…soon." Silas said in a low whisper. Stefan was almost sure Jeremy couldn't hear it, but then again he was a hunter. Silas had something on his hand. A small dagger. Jeremy's eyes widened at the sight of the knife. Silas also took something out of his pocket. It was a small locket. He played with it for a while. Stefan had never seen anything like it before, but it bore a symbol of some kind.

Silas took a step towards Jeremy. "You have worn your usefulness, dear child." He said sarcastically holding the knife.

Stefan took a step back, then one back forward.

_I wont hurt him. _Suddenly that was all Stefan could think about.

_I wont hurt him. I wont hurt him._

He wont really hurt him.

Stefan watched as Silas approached Jeremy. "Please, I…I have a sister." It was all he could think to say. The knife was on his throat now.

Suddenly Jeremy's eyes turned into a nearby corner. The fear from them disappeared. The room grew cold. Stefan turned to look at the spot Jeremy was staring at. There was something there…or more like someone.

Even he could see it now. A dark shape.

There was a loud bang. Stefan saw Silas moving fast to where he had previously seen the shape. Jeremy was left free and he instantly tried to break the chains. He even managed to loosen up one. Stefan remembered what Silas had said and went to him.

Jeremy felt a strong arms holding him from behind..

"I'm sorry Jer. I can't have you running, who knows what just happened. Could be dangerous." Stefan said.

"I know exactly what happened. Bonnie. Buying me time to escape, so get your filthy Ripper hands off me before I make you."

"If you haven't notice you're in chains." Stefan answered. If Jeremy wanted to have a sass fight, Stefan could manage that.

"Also if you haven't notice your witch girlfriend has a knife on her throat, is completely powerless and oh..very much alive." Silas said.

He was standing in the corner holding a knife on Bonnie's throat. But there was something else on her neck as well. The locket. She was wearing it now.

Bonnie kept trying to cast spells. Anything. But Silas was right she couldn't.

"I knew you were strong enough to push your way through the veil. You are a fighter after all." Silas said to her moving the knife playfully on her bare throat.

"You just needed a little push."

"Stefan?" She said.

"No, honey. I'm Silas, Stefan is the one over there."

Bonnie looked at Stefan.

"I know you can fight your way out of this, Stefan. You could last time with Klaus. Silas is nothing but a compelling liar. Just remember who you are, this isn't you. This uncaring person who can do this to us! Just let yourself feel and care!"

Stefan didn't move, and was thinking how to respond, but suddenly Silas moved again. He had hit Bonnie hard on the head. She fell to the floor unconscious.

"NO!" Jeremy screamed until Silas reached him and did the same to him.

"We need to talk." Silas said simply to Stefan.

"Yeh, What the hell just happened?"

**A lot was left unclear I know :P But the next chapter will be up sooner than usual ;) So hang in there dear reader!**

**Also I feel very uncertain when writing about "mythology" stuff from the show, since I don't consider my self as a Vampire Diaries fan, just a Paul Wesley/Stefan fangirl.. So feel free to correct me if I'm screwing something up!**

**Reply to Stefan's girl:**

**Don't worry I absolutely love your little monologues :) also you seem to remember/know a lot more about the show's mythology, so you are helping me a great deal and all your ideas are amazing. As you can see the events in this chapter were influenced by you a great deal :D I should maybe add you as a co-author ! :D**


	11. Chapter 11

**I promised the next chapter would be here soon, so here it is! I know it's really short, but I feel it works better as its own.**

Silas handcuffed Bonnie as well. They left them in the basement together, lying on the floor.

"Like Romeo and Juliet." Silas said. Stefan looked at him questioning.

"It's the only book I've managed to read since I returned." Silas explained "Apart from your diaries of course."

Together they climbed upstairs. The night had fallen and it was pitch black outside.

And suddenly Stefan was even more tired than he had realized.

"How is Bonnie alive?" He asked.

Silas smiled. "Because she has raw power. Raw power when channeled by anger or other strong emotions is..well strong. I knew breaking the veil was possible since Qet used to do it. Once in every hundred or so years she'd come to me. Wake me from my slumber and throw herself at me. And she was _very much alive_. Bonnie is powerful, she has the same potential as Qet, she just can't control it. But her anger can, although I believe she revived herself accidently, she was just trying to help Jeremy."

"So it's Qet now?"

"She was my best friend after all." Silas answered

" So...The locket is for…stripping Bonnie of her powers." Stefan continued.

Silas smiled a bit. Stefan didn't need confirmation. But still Silas nodded.

"I made it long time ago, just in case. There are two of those. Locket of the mother and locker of the daughter as I call them. She is wearing the daughter's one, which yes makes her entirely powerless, but also makes her bend to the will of who ever has the Locket of the Mother." Silas took out another locket from his pocket.

"A queen asked me to craft her these, as she learned her daughter was about to ran off with a slave." He smiled. "I swore never to use them myself. But the end justifies the means."

Stefan had never heard his doppelgänger talk about his life as a mortal. He was ever so curious..

"Were you happy?" Stefan didn't mean to say it. It just came out.

Silas smiled to his old memories.

"As a mortal yes. I was very happy..for a while."

Stefan smiled as well. He could relate to that.

The tension between them was growing. Stefan still had so much to ask, but he also needed to sleep and think.

"Good night my shadow self." Silas said suddenly, before Stefan could mention that he needed sleep.

Stefan took it as a dismiss and nodded.

**OoooooO**

Stefan lie awake for a long while. He couldn't sleep. He was feeling guilty and proud, scared and excited all at the same time. His bedroom door opened. Silas was standing in the doorway.

"I needed you to know." He said. "Bonnie was lying."

Stefan nodded sleepily without bothering to stand up.

"I know you're not manipulating me."

"No, Stefan. I know you care, more than anyone. I can feel it."

And just like that he was gone and Stefan fell asleep.

**The Lockets are a mark of respect to Young Dracula, which has The rings of Arianrhod that work kind of the same way.**

**And yes I'm going to call Qetsiyah just Qet from now on since each time I write her name I have to search for it in VDwikia since I can never spell it right -.-'**

**Reply to Stefan's Girl: First of all THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU ! :) I absolutely love your reviews and questions, they really make me think what I'm writing here.. I don't know about the Elena/Kat connection, I haven't really thought about it, since Elena is my least fav character and I try to avoid writing too much about her so my deep hatred won't show, but you are right it would make a lot of sense! **

**I guess there will be something like Salvatore spell book, since Silas has a lot of special tricks up his sleeve, This is kind of a spoiler ; I'm thinking about doing the story in two parts, the part where we are at is the 1st one where we explore the whole Stefan/Silas relationship, connection etc... There will be a clear end to it, after which ( in the 2nd part) I'd like to go more to the Salvatore/ Silas history and deepen their relationship maybe a bit more. **

**And you have no idea how much Stilas feels writing this story is causing me! :D**


	12. Chapter 12

Stefan woke up. He inhaled and exhaled. Today was the day, he just knew it instantly when waking up. Today they would do it

He would free Lexi. He would also bring upon the end of the world as we know it or start something new. He didn't really care anymore which one would happen. And all this he would do together with Silas.

Stefan walked downstairs and met his doppelgänger right belove the stairs.

"We have a problem." He said.

Stefan gave him a questioning look.

Silas had been up all night preparing. He had Bonnie do sequence of preparations spells since what they were trying to acomplish was complicated and extremely difficult. He had also used the internet to locate cults that would be willing to follow him, and had managed to call them, even though he still had minor problems with technology. But the cult would be in Mystic Falls soon enough.

"Everyone can sense it. I've had Bonnie start the spell. It's powerful magic. Every witch in the world will be able to trace it to mystic falls. And soon everyone will see its effects. And then we have the problem of your friends, who will clearly try to intervene. But I have people who can deal with them." Silas smirked. "Everything will be fine. I just need you to stay inside the house and be safe."

"No." Stefan exclaimed.

"As you said they are my friends. I can take care of them. To make them understand this is what needs to be done."

Silas placed a hand on Stefan's shoulder. He had done it earlier and Stefan had always stiffened and felt uncomfortable. Not this time. He placed his palm above Silas'

"I can do this." He said and ran out.

Silas watched after him. He could still feel the warmth of Stefan's hand on his. Of course it wasn't real heat he was feeling, Stefan was undead like him.

He was feeling something else. Something more.

Stefan ran straight to the Salvatore house. He knocked at the door. Damon opened it. Stefan smiled at him, Damon's eyes flashed and within seconds Stefan was pinned against the wall.

"Who are you and what have you done with my little brother?" Elena came into the lounge with arms crossed across her chest. Stefan felt more pain. They were supposed to be the two most closest people to him in the world and they couldn't even recognize him.

"Damon, it's me." Stefan managed to say.

"Prove it." Damon spat.

"West Virginia 1869, it was me. You always suspected it and brought it up in conversations for ages. I never admit anything. I'm admitting now." Stefan said fast.

Damon let him go.

"Got to see you brother." He said and pat him brotherly in the back.

"Stefan…what is going on?" Elena said stepping closer. She had been trying to find Jeremy and calling Bonnie for help, but hadn't reach neither of them, so she had ended up crying the rest of the night.

"Jeremy is fine." Stefan said simply.

Elena took a step back gasping.

"So you know about that…what else do you know, little brother?" Damon asked suspiciously.

"That I'm here to talk. We needed Jeremy for something but no harm was done to him. I promise." He looked at Elena. She was gasping. He had betrayed her once again. Then again that was all they ever had done to each other; hurt and betray.

"we?" Damon asked.

"I'm working with someone. You would disapprove about it. But we are going to break the walls of the other side and the human equivalent." Stefan said simply. He wasn't really selling his case, but he would get to that soon.

"Are you crazy? Surely you are not that stupid! You know what it will do? Crack them open and the whole world collapses." Damon said.

"Maybe maybe not." Said Stefan with a calculative voice.

"And that's a chance you're willing to take?" Elena said.

Stefan bit his lip. He had made up his mind, even though it sounded crazy.

"Look at this world, Elena. Look at what it does to people. They either die tragically as good person or end up a is so much pain and evil. Before you say that there is also good, I know that. But it fades. Look at me. Look at you two. We are all monsters now."

Damon tilted his head.

"Ok, little brother I think it's human blood rehab time. Mind if I tie you to a chair?"

Stefan laughed a bit.

"Go ahead. Force the evil out of me. That wont work, it's innate. You know there once was someone who taught me to keep it at bay. But she is gone now it took me long to realize that without her I don't stand a chance. Who should I thank for that?"

Damon shut up. Stefan didn't bring up Lexi's death a lot. Damon didn't doubt or regret his actions. But if he did killing Lexi would have been on the top of the list.

"Stefan." Elena said breathing heavily and forcing herself to walk to him.

"Stop this." She said looking at him with puppy eyes.

"What ever it is that you think you're doing stop. I know you. You are a good person. Good persons aren't perfect, they are allowed to make mistakes."

Stefan sighed. He had already explained her this once.

"Elena you don't know me. You know a piece of me. Something that I wanted you to see. And yes, I once was a good person, and after I've wanted to be one so badly, denying every horrid thing I ever did and the urges I feel. It's all in vain. I've looked in the mirror. Seen all the potential in me. Seen what I could be. I know who I am now. Who I want to be. This is me without regrets, but still feeling and living life as fullest. And like this I'm not a good person. It's not my goal anymore." He said speaking loudly and clearly.

**OooooO**

Bonnie was continuing the spell. The last spell that needed to be done before all hell would break loose.

Silas looked at her greedily. He was wearing the locket and telling her what do to. She was completely under his control. It almost felt like doing magic again. And Silas missed doing magic so very much..

She stopped chanting and her eyes closed.

Silas looked outside. The sky was becoming dark. He smiled a bit. Almost. He just needed to add the final touch.

He walked to the center of the ritual ring. There stood an empty place. He took the orb out of his pocket. Magical energy was flowing all around the room. Once he placed the orb it would focus on it. It would open the doors.

All the doors and barriers. Dunixi would be free. The world would collapse. He knew there was no chance it wouldn't._ But he didn't care._

Silas looked around again. He was about to destroy the world. He had waited for this for 2000 years. Why was he stopping now? Why did he care?

On his other pocket there was a reminder. A diary, that was light to carry but heavy on his mind. A diary he always carried around. A diary that wasn't his.

The owner of that diary was still in this world. Risking his neck for Silas' plan.

Silas looked at the growing storm outside. He kept thinking about him, wondering if he was alright, and hoping that the he could spend the last moments on this world with him. As soon as that thought crossed his mind he knew what was wrong.

He didn't want this anymore. He didn't need to do it. He couldn't do it since there was something left to care in this world.

He put the orb back to his pocket and slowly took out the diary.

"Stefan." He whispered.

But he couldn't just walk away from this. There was too much magical energy. He wouldn't just let it go to waste.

He placed the diary in the middle of the ring instead.

**Thank you for reading :) And sorry for the cliffhanger! :S **

**Also I have mentioned before that this story is going to be in two parts; the first one has been more of less ready for a long time, Idk if you can tell, but the first part is soon coming to an end (there's maybe 2-3 chapters left)!**

**This probably means that it's going to take me longer to update since I really need to work on the 2nd part of the story.**

**Reply to Stefan's girl: THANK YOU AGAIN :) especially for the doppelgänger information! You got me googling around for hours...I really need to use it here somewhere! I'm also angtsy at VD at the moment.. cause of the premiere of the 5th season and the hold that Elena still seems to have on poor Steffy..So I'm channeling it by writing more Stilas scenes in this thing ;D**


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